Omg ... We are going to be parents!!

I woke up this morning to take a pregnancy test. And, honestly, I just didn't think that I would see the positive sign. WOW!!! It said "positive"!! I woke up Vincent "Can you come look at this?" He comes in the bathroom looks at it, looks at the information and he looks up at me and said "We are going to be parents. We are PREGNANT"! I was in total SHOCK! Two hours later, I took another test because I thought that it might be wrong though in my head I know that you can't get a false positive. I called Kaiser and got an appointment set.

Vincent and I drove down to Hillsboro to celebrate and get some prenatal vitamins, pregnancy journal, some reading material, and a gift for Mom and Dad (Vincent's parents) cause we were dying to tell them. We got them a bag of goodies to make them guess (some baby corns, baby baby pickles, some baby cans of diet pepsi, some baby muffins, a kid book called "Hop on Pop" and then some candy bars. :) Mom started to get the guess --- saw the book and knew for sure that she was going to be a Gramma! Dad and her were so EXCITED! :)

I can't wait to see you little one! You are 4 weeks old! I can't wait ... Just another 35 weeks to go :) I love you already! Welcome to our family ... we can't wait to see you!

Let the Purge Begin

Yesterday I decided that I was going to go through my closet, my drawers, UNDER MY BED of all the clothes I have and get arid of a bunch. Yesterday I was a little sad. There are some things that I have kept for 6-7 years but I refuse to get arid of and then there are things that I have boughten but never fit right and they stayed in my closet. I wanted to make a clean slate so when I get up in the morning, I go to my closet and say "What am I going to wear?" And I have an easier choice and then just wearing something baggy that make me feel bad all day or something that is completely unflattering that I will be like "ugh .....I shouldn't have worn this."

I wrote on my PnP journal just how emotional it is to get arid of clothes but this is my response back to people ..... It sums it up pretty good.

Purge is still in progress but so far so good. I went through yesterday just my closet. I tried on shirts and the ones that don't compliment me and when I wear them, I feel terrible in either too tight or the ones that are baggier in the tummy area so that I didn't show my fat rolls before, I got arid of them. 2 bags of clothes so far. I have to go through underneath my bed and pull out the "before" Becca let go of herself and pick out 3 items from before and then the rest I am going to get arid of. It felt good in a way to be able to have room in my closet and know that everything in there is stuff that I wear. I still have some "in between" ok stuff that I am not attached too but I certainly don't want to be running around here with no clothes. I just told my DH that I am going to keep certain things because they are "ok" and I like them but when I get out of these 12's they are off to goodwill. :) The nice part of the purge yesterday is there are shirts that I was like I am goign to get arid of .... they never fit right. So I tried them on, and they look good on me. WORKING ON THOSE ARMS for the summer. I will have some cute outfits. :P

I encourage any of you who haven't done this yet to do it. I find it yesterday kind of a mental cleaning day. Showed me that I have lost weight, shows that I am making progress and I am not going to let the FG back in.

My DH goes well that is cute, you can keep it and when you get pregnant or after the baby that you can wear it. I said "hun I hope to be at least 2 sizes smaller than what I was when I get pregnant. they have clothes that are maternity clothes and then when we have the baby. Im off the gym again. I am gonna be a hot momma!" I think for me it was saying that I am not going to ever allow myself to creep up to 16's again. NO WAY. I was so unhappy there and I am not going to be there again.

I have to get the purge finished today. My bedroom looks like a tornado came through.

Hope you are all having a great day! (((HUGS))))

Update in my life ..

Ok I have been gone for about a month and half. Where have I been? Whats been going on? First of all, I lost my sweet Grampa to death on February 1st. It was indeed the hardest phone call I had ever received. It killed me! I still today can't believe he is gone or maybe I just don't want to believe that he is gone. EVERYDAY I miss him more and more. He was 5 days away from coming to Oregon to look at this house he wanted to buy, he just signed the papers on his house to be sold 2 days before that. His dream was coming true but his heart gave away too fast. :(
I have been dealing with the mess that one gets to have after someone they love dies. I haven't had too much time to grief, I guess really what is it all mean to grief. I have been dealing with realtors, lawyers, life insurance people, my family ..... sigh. I haven't had a moment to really soak in all the stuff and I think mentally I am trying not too because if I do that means that I will have to believe he isn't here anymore.
On the other side of my life, fitness has become more important to me than ever. Why? Because I want to be healthy for a long time, I don't want the health problems that the rest of my family deals with. I have dealt with my problem long enough and its time to change. :) Now I am working hard on kicking some butt!

I was honored when the girls at PnP asked me to be the spotlight of the month there. Here is my story and my little page that they gave me. I am truly honored. I am hoping in time to make more of a difference at PnP and be able to help more of the girls and inspire them to be the best they can be. :)
I am hoping that my life will calm down here in a bit. I am looking forward to some goals that I have in mind this summer. :)
Take care everyone!!!